Monthly Archives: November 2011

The report that doomed it. I’m writing again.

Just so you know, I’ve taken myself off of the Writers-Network website, so any work will definatly be on here now. This was on the website. It’s more from Davey Hertz when he was a kid (can’t get him and his voices out of my head). So here it is, the report that doomed it:

And there was up roar today when John Hertz, the loud mouth of the great government, brought his six year old son into Speaker’s Square this afternoon. And we’re moving straight to our correspondent live in Speaker’s Square. Richard, why was this such a big deal.

Well, this has actually been the first public outing for the young boy and what an outing it was. Mr Hertz came here to Speaker’s Square to publicly settle an agreement with his German equal, Mr Von Gloon, but when the German man arrived, Davey, Mr Hertz son, actually ran from the square for reasons we are still uncertain of.

It weren’t my fault, Daddy. It’s not my fault. It was your fault. You said you’d come after me and save me and then everyone would think you were the best. Daddy, you’re the best.

Davey was found a good three or so hours later, in a state that isn’t really suitable to describe. The police have found no evidence of a reason for such an attempt of what we can only call brutal murder, but Mr Hertz has expressed his views, clearly as always, that the attempt on his son’s life was nothing to do with the meeting with Mr Von Gloon.

Please don’t see the report. Please don’t see the report. They’re lying. They think you’re the bad guy but you’re not. You love me.

Of course, there is the ironic condition of the boy, isn’t there Richard.

No! It had nothing to do with that! Don’t speak about it! You’ll make him angry. Please, Daddy, don’t get angry! Please don’t get angry.

Yes, really it’s quite funny. Because John Hertz is known for his violent and loud nature. Everyone knows that if you want to know something secret, you turn to John Hertz. But there is no chance of that happening with his son, is there.

It’s i-i-irrelicant. You don’t need to talk about it. Why are you going to say it? Why do you want Daddy to be angry? Why are you all so meanie to him?

No, because his son was actually born without a voice box, meaning he can’t even make a sound.

It’s funny, you’ll say. You always say that.

It’s funny really…

The great mouth’s son…

…the great mouth’s son…

Without a voice.

…without a voice.

Shut up! Just shut up ok! Why do you always have to be talking about it? If I could talk and you couldn’t I wouldn’t be talking about it. I wouldn’t make your Daddy angry.

When asked to comment on his son’s condition, Mr Hertz said that it was “nothing to worry about “. We now know that Davey is resting at home.

“Davey. Davey where are you?”

Daddy go away. It wasn’t my fault.

“Oh, here you are. Watching yourself on the telly, are you?”

Daddy, no. I already hurt. I want to speak, Daddy. Please don’t try and make me. I already hurt.

“Come on, Davey. Let’s see it we can’t fix this.”

Hey, I’m back

First things, first. I’m back. Hello. I know I’ve been gone a while. Sorry for the lack of commitment on my part but I’m back now. There is a reason I’ve been gone for so long. I wasn’t just sat playing on games or nothing. First thing first there’s school. Last year of school and everything, there’s a lot to think about – school work, post 16, keeping your friends, shifting the pieces of rubbish that were once your friends but are now dog poo, trying to keep up with your extra curricular so that you can get into post 16. Yeah, I was keeping busy and that was just school.

I’ve also been doing a readathon. I’ve been trying to support the charity Catch22 (which is an amazing charity and if anyone wants to do anything for a charity, this one deserves some support because it helps people to get their lives back) but, due to communication issues, it was becoming a problem, so I did this readathon. I read three books – Long Lankin (which I had to read for the extra curricular), Catch-22 (which is so funny, I would recommend it to anyone who wants something challenging to read. It is now my new favourite book) and Kill All Enemies (which is an amazing book which is about really what the charity is about). Well, I finished reading the last book about 10 minuets ago, so I’ll do some quick reviews of them later. All three books are amazing, and I’ve raised loads of money for a really good cause so I am now the owner of a chuffed face.

Finally, I JUST REALISED ITS ONLY 2 MONTHS TILL THE END OF JANUARY.

So what? you might say. Well, basically, I’ve got about 4 writing competitions for that time, 2 of which I haven’t even started yet, so I’ve been busy with that one too.

But, enough moaning. Time for some writing to be done.